


Like, What Is Love?

by ArchangelUnmei



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers, Shakespeare - Works
Genre: Gen, Kink Meme, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-09-02
Updated: 2010-09-02
Packaged: 2017-10-11 10:03:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 802
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/111201
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ArchangelUnmei/pseuds/ArchangelUnmei
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>England accidentally leaves one of his Shakespeare books at a meeting in Warsaw. Poland is fascinated.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Like, What Is Love?

Lithuania's not really sure how it happened.

He walked through the living room on the way to his office, and Poland was sitting on the couch with his feet propped up on the coffee table, painting his toe nails. He looked over at Lithuania and raised an eyebrow. "Like, what's that, Liet?"

Lithuania held up the thick, leather-bound book he was carrying. "This? I think England must have left it at the last meeting, I was going to go put it in the office so we don't forget to take it back to him."

"England?" Poland perked up, putting his nail polish aside and fanning his toes. "Gimme. Maybe it's like one of his magical books or some junk like that. I could totally magic us up a pony!"

"I dunno," Lithuania frowned doubtfully. "That really doesn't seem like a good-"

Poland leaned over, snatching the book out of his hands. "You _totally_ worry _way_ too much, Liet. It's no good for your skin. You'll get icky wrinkles and stuff." He set the book on his knees, flipping it open to a random page in the middle.

Lithuania sighed and ran a hand through his hair, then shook his head and decided to leave Poland to it. Even if it was a spell book, Lithuania didn't think that Poland would blow the house up. Probably.

Still, he thought it would be a good idea to go hide in his office. Maybe he could finally finish some of that paperwork his president kept sending.

~*~

"Hark, Liet,"

Lithuania stopped writing, blinking down at the paper on his desk, wondering for a long moment if he'd actually heard what he just heard. Slowly he lifted his head, giving Poland a confused look. "...Did you just say 'hark'?"

Poland grinned at him, the book tucked under one arm. "Yeah, like, hark! Dos't I not see like a totally bored Liet, besieged as he is on ever side by the lamest paperwork that man could conjure?"

Lithuania was pretty sure his eyes were falling out of his head by now. "...You cast a spell, didn't you? I knew this was a bad idea. Just let me call England-"

Before he got the chance, Poland had crossed the room, still grinning, and put a finger to Lithuania's lips. "Nay, sweet Liet - omigod that totally rhymes, doesn't it? - thou should totally not blame my current speechiness on a spell. 'Tis, like, love!"

Lithuania eyed him. "Love?"

Poland nodded happily. "_Totally_ love." He flipped the book open, brow furrowing for a moment as he flipped pages, apparently searching for something in particular. "Aha! So, like,

"Like, what is love, really? 'tis not hereafter or whatever;  
Present mirth hath, like, present laughter;  
What's to come is still so totally unsure:  
In delay there lies, like, no plenty _at all_;  
Then come and totally kiss me, sweet and twenty and junk,  
Youth's a thingy will not endure."

Poland trailed off, then glanced up at Lithuania, suddenly unsure if quoting Shakespeare was really that appealing for someone like him. To his surprise and pleasure, Lithuania was staring at him with rather dark, smokey eyes.

"Kiss you sweet and twenty 'and junk', huh?" Lithuania smirked, the one that always sent the really nice shivers down Poland's spine. "I think I can work the 'and junk' in pretty well." His smirk widened, and he practically jumped across the desk, making Poland squeal in surprise and delight.

The book went flying from Poland's hand when they both landed on the thick rug.

It didn't get returned to England for a long, long time.

~*~

"Hark, England!"

England frowned, staring down at the newspaper in his hands. He must be hallucinating, or something. He knew he shouldn't have given in and let America buy him that burger. Maybe if he ignored it, it would go away.

"Like, _hello_!" Poland leaned over, waving a hand in front of England's face, and the other Nation jerked back and dropped his paper.

"Good God, Poland! What do you want?" England paused. "Did you just 'hark'?"

Poland grinned at him. He had a certain 'well sexed' glow around him, and England decided he didn't want to know. "Like, yeah! Hark and junk! Forsooth, I hath totally come to return your, like, super awesome old book into your nigh invincible hands."

England's eyes were wide, and he felt his heart sinking as Poland offered him his copy of Shakespeare's complete works, which he'd lost at a meeting in Warsaw weeks ago. "Poland. Did you read this?"

"Indeed, fair England! Tis, like, the best of prose I've ever read. In English, anyway. And, like, guess what, it totally turns Liet on when I talk like this!"

England put his head in his hands and wondered if it was too late to have Shakespeare banned.

**Author's Note:**

> Written for a prompt in the kink meme asking for Poland speaking in Shakespearean English, but with his Valley Girl accent intact, and for Liet to find it _really hot_.
> 
> The part quoted (underneath Poland's butchering) is from Act 2, Scene 3 of _Twelfth Night_, which is my favorite of Shakespeare's comedies. I imagine Poland would probably like it too, what with all the cross-dressing, practical jokes and mistaken identities. And the HoYay (did I mention I ship Antonio/Sebastian like burning?).


End file.
